There is a very old saying...
Posted: Mon Jun 16, 2008 10:06 pm“…When the pupil is ready, the master will appear.”
I’ve been a lurker here on the fringe of the community for a while, and I didn’t feel ready to take action until now. For a lot of reasons. I felt it was immoral to try to sleep with women I’d just met, even though I did that all the time in college; back then I could rationalize it as wanting to be good in bed for when I eventually settled down. Or I felt like this was outside my reality. Most of the hot girls I’d ever met seemed to like model-handsome guys with lots of money. This is the order of the universe, the law of nature. There can’t possibly be ways to circumvent it, right? A big part of me hoped not, because then I’ve got no excuse, and I have to face the unknown and take charge of my life.
And that’s a hard thing for a semi - “natural” like me to do. I’ve never had trouble getting laid, mostly because the girls I dated in high school and college approached me. I’m not saying they were all 10s. They weren’t. There were more than a few 5’s thrown in there. Whenever I got in a slump, a less-than-stellar conquest would give me a little momentum. That lasted me over ten years, from the beginning of high school to now, going after the low-hanging fruit and never approaching the 10s or addressing my feelings of unworthiness. I always went after the girls who chose me, and missed out on learning how to choose the ones I wanted and figure out how to attract them.
Some years ago, at the peak of my natural, untutored game, I happened to go out one night, not thinking about picking up, and stumbled upon a beautiful woman that I wanted badly, who also wanted me. I’d been having a good semester as far as pulling ass was concerned, and the game gods must have been smiling that night because I did everything right. Said the right things, had the right frame and attitude, just in the zone. I never could understand what I had done right because back then I lacked the vocabulary to describe the interaction.
We did the long distance thing for over a year. We spent days in bed the few times we were able to see each other, and it was great while it lasted but one day she pulled the rug out from under me, and I’ve never gotten my game back. The aftermath of one-itis has been gruesome. I mean really. I’ve never been able to re-ascend to that peak of success, although not for lack of trying though, I piled up so many one night stands afterwards trying to build a foundation for my self-image and inner game, but it wasn’t very solid.
It’s been a long time coming, this realization that I need to start from square one and really build a better me from the ground up before I’m going to have this area of my life handled. But I’m ready to begin. I’m tired of settling for the third-string girls who throw themselves at me. It’s stupid and dangerous, and a lot of them have serious problems. At the end of the day, I really don’t want to be some kind of player, and I don’t harbor these fantasies of bagging a different HB10 every night. In fact, I wouldn’t necessarily be opposed to a monogamous LTR if I could just exercise some kind of choice out in the field and stop myself from coming out of this scarcity frame. I’ve been reading pickup literature in a vacuum for a while now and it’s taken me that long to be okay with it morally and philosophically, but I’m ready. I would be honored to watch you guys work and to see with my own eyes what’s really possible.
Sorry for the long post, I've been wanting to air that out for a while and see if anyone out there can feel where I'm coming from. Get at me and let me know what y'all think.
I’ve been a lurker here on the fringe of the community for a while, and I didn’t feel ready to take action until now. For a lot of reasons. I felt it was immoral to try to sleep with women I’d just met, even though I did that all the time in college; back then I could rationalize it as wanting to be good in bed for when I eventually settled down. Or I felt like this was outside my reality. Most of the hot girls I’d ever met seemed to like model-handsome guys with lots of money. This is the order of the universe, the law of nature. There can’t possibly be ways to circumvent it, right? A big part of me hoped not, because then I’ve got no excuse, and I have to face the unknown and take charge of my life.
And that’s a hard thing for a semi - “natural” like me to do. I’ve never had trouble getting laid, mostly because the girls I dated in high school and college approached me. I’m not saying they were all 10s. They weren’t. There were more than a few 5’s thrown in there. Whenever I got in a slump, a less-than-stellar conquest would give me a little momentum. That lasted me over ten years, from the beginning of high school to now, going after the low-hanging fruit and never approaching the 10s or addressing my feelings of unworthiness. I always went after the girls who chose me, and missed out on learning how to choose the ones I wanted and figure out how to attract them.
Some years ago, at the peak of my natural, untutored game, I happened to go out one night, not thinking about picking up, and stumbled upon a beautiful woman that I wanted badly, who also wanted me. I’d been having a good semester as far as pulling ass was concerned, and the game gods must have been smiling that night because I did everything right. Said the right things, had the right frame and attitude, just in the zone. I never could understand what I had done right because back then I lacked the vocabulary to describe the interaction.
We did the long distance thing for over a year. We spent days in bed the few times we were able to see each other, and it was great while it lasted but one day she pulled the rug out from under me, and I’ve never gotten my game back. The aftermath of one-itis has been gruesome. I mean really. I’ve never been able to re-ascend to that peak of success, although not for lack of trying though, I piled up so many one night stands afterwards trying to build a foundation for my self-image and inner game, but it wasn’t very solid.
It’s been a long time coming, this realization that I need to start from square one and really build a better me from the ground up before I’m going to have this area of my life handled. But I’m ready to begin. I’m tired of settling for the third-string girls who throw themselves at me. It’s stupid and dangerous, and a lot of them have serious problems. At the end of the day, I really don’t want to be some kind of player, and I don’t harbor these fantasies of bagging a different HB10 every night. In fact, I wouldn’t necessarily be opposed to a monogamous LTR if I could just exercise some kind of choice out in the field and stop myself from coming out of this scarcity frame. I’ve been reading pickup literature in a vacuum for a while now and it’s taken me that long to be okay with it morally and philosophically, but I’m ready. I would be honored to watch you guys work and to see with my own eyes what’s really possible.
Sorry for the long post, I've been wanting to air that out for a while and see if anyone out there can feel where I'm coming from. Get at me and let me know what y'all think.