A Peice of my Soul
Posted: Mon Apr 21, 2008 2:22 amHi guys, My handle is Puma (its the shirt that I am wearing) and I hate my life. This post is as much a journey into self actualization and epiphany as it is about wasting your time leading an ordinary life (which is what I was/am doing). I don't know if this is the right forum but here it goes.
I am 27 Years old and I have had one girlfriend my Entire life and she is the only one I have slept with. I met her in college exactly 3 yrs 6months ago and we have been together ever since. She is a really sweet girl and really introverted and shy. I guess more then anything I preferred the sheltered life. It was easier to stay at home and chill with her then to go out and have new experiences and meet new people. About 2 years ago, i moved to Dallas when i got a job. I have been in this town and I only really have like 2 friends (not going out to meet new people). One is my old college buddy who is living with his girlfriend (he is a complete AFC just like me I guess) and the other is a work Friend who is worse then an AFC (I am trying to pull him in my new world as a wing).
Over the last few months I have had a sort of an Epiphany. I don't really like my life. In fact I hate it. I love my job. I love my car. But there was this hole in my soul that my GF could not fill anymore. I was not liking this sheltered life anymore. I am generally an outgoing person but ever since i got a GF it was just easier to not even try and go out. I decided to make some changes. I have been working out and I got contacts. I was loosing my hair so I just shaved the shit off (might get plugs but thats up in the air but i think it actually looks better with a buzz cut).My girlfriend began to realize that I was increasing my value (something RSD taught me) so she gave me gentle negs to kinda make sure I was not gonna split. She began pushing for marriage etc etc. I am not ready and I know I will not be for a while.
About five weeks ago, I clicked on this ad from a weightlifting website called Stronglifts. It took me to this site called Real Social Dynamics. I was intrigued in this (i am always open to new things) and got Tyler's DVD + Jeffy Show + Foundations. I was watching the RSD dvd and something just clicked in my head. This guy was talking what I was feeling. I watched upto DVD 7 but i realized that i was doing this all backwards. I needed the seed before i could enjoy the plant (bad metaphor, but you get it)
So i bought this book called The Game by Neil Strauss and finished it in 2 nights. I tell you there are few points in life that define a person. A moment might look back and Say YES that was it. I think that moment was when I clicked on that RSD link. Everything grew from there. I knew my purpose. I needed to experience life. I am not talking just about PUA but about meeting new people and actually getting out there to see what happens.
I am actually not introverted. I am usually very good at interacting with new people because my job (Consultant) demands it and I have to meet new clients all the time. I went to a club with a friend of mine (the one with the GF above) about three or four months ago and this was well before I knew anything about PUA or the "Game". I actually number closed two chicks within 1 hour. I did not mean to but it just kinda came naturally. I knew i would never call them but i just wanted to see if I could do it. I guess my biggest strength is I don't really give a fuck how people see me but also my biggest weakness is I HATE rejection.
I am re-thinking some of my life priorities and actually took a break from my GF so i can recalibrate my inner self with the person that i am and the person that i want to be. I do really want to go gaming with some of the folks I read on these forums because I want to see the masters at work. This is not because I want to necessarily pick up women (that will come later) but I want to meet new people who are intelligent and social. I am gathering as much knowledge as I can and I also realize that I have to be happy with MYSELF first and foremost before being happy with a girl.
I will keep you all updated on my journey into a new world. I dont know if you care or not but it feels really good to get this off my chest. In the meantime any help/tips/routine is appreciate.Thanks Guys.
I am 27 Years old and I have had one girlfriend my Entire life and she is the only one I have slept with. I met her in college exactly 3 yrs 6months ago and we have been together ever since. She is a really sweet girl and really introverted and shy. I guess more then anything I preferred the sheltered life. It was easier to stay at home and chill with her then to go out and have new experiences and meet new people. About 2 years ago, i moved to Dallas when i got a job. I have been in this town and I only really have like 2 friends (not going out to meet new people). One is my old college buddy who is living with his girlfriend (he is a complete AFC just like me I guess) and the other is a work Friend who is worse then an AFC (I am trying to pull him in my new world as a wing).
Over the last few months I have had a sort of an Epiphany. I don't really like my life. In fact I hate it. I love my job. I love my car. But there was this hole in my soul that my GF could not fill anymore. I was not liking this sheltered life anymore. I am generally an outgoing person but ever since i got a GF it was just easier to not even try and go out. I decided to make some changes. I have been working out and I got contacts. I was loosing my hair so I just shaved the shit off (might get plugs but thats up in the air but i think it actually looks better with a buzz cut).My girlfriend began to realize that I was increasing my value (something RSD taught me) so she gave me gentle negs to kinda make sure I was not gonna split. She began pushing for marriage etc etc. I am not ready and I know I will not be for a while.
About five weeks ago, I clicked on this ad from a weightlifting website called Stronglifts. It took me to this site called Real Social Dynamics. I was intrigued in this (i am always open to new things) and got Tyler's DVD + Jeffy Show + Foundations. I was watching the RSD dvd and something just clicked in my head. This guy was talking what I was feeling. I watched upto DVD 7 but i realized that i was doing this all backwards. I needed the seed before i could enjoy the plant (bad metaphor, but you get it)
So i bought this book called The Game by Neil Strauss and finished it in 2 nights. I tell you there are few points in life that define a person. A moment might look back and Say YES that was it. I think that moment was when I clicked on that RSD link. Everything grew from there. I knew my purpose. I needed to experience life. I am not talking just about PUA but about meeting new people and actually getting out there to see what happens.
I am actually not introverted. I am usually very good at interacting with new people because my job (Consultant) demands it and I have to meet new clients all the time. I went to a club with a friend of mine (the one with the GF above) about three or four months ago and this was well before I knew anything about PUA or the "Game". I actually number closed two chicks within 1 hour. I did not mean to but it just kinda came naturally. I knew i would never call them but i just wanted to see if I could do it. I guess my biggest strength is I don't really give a fuck how people see me but also my biggest weakness is I HATE rejection.
I am re-thinking some of my life priorities and actually took a break from my GF so i can recalibrate my inner self with the person that i am and the person that i want to be. I do really want to go gaming with some of the folks I read on these forums because I want to see the masters at work. This is not because I want to necessarily pick up women (that will come later) but I want to meet new people who are intelligent and social. I am gathering as much knowledge as I can and I also realize that I have to be happy with MYSELF first and foremost before being happy with a girl.
I will keep you all updated on my journey into a new world. I dont know if you care or not but it feels really good to get this off my chest. In the meantime any help/tips/routine is appreciate.Thanks Guys.